Everton’s Idrissa Gueye has Main Job Outside of Football

LONDON, ENGLAND - MARCH 05: Idrissa Gueye of Everton looks on in the sun during the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and Everton at White Hart Lane on March 5, 2017 in London, England. (Photo by Dan Mullan/Getty Images)
LONDON, ENGLAND - MARCH 05: Idrissa Gueye of Everton looks on in the sun during the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and Everton at White Hart Lane on March 5, 2017 in London, England. (Photo by Dan Mullan/Getty Images) /
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Idrissa Gana Gueye is no ordinary player, he and maybe Herrera are the only players who compare to Kante this season, who is being praised as the king of the Premier League midfield. Gana has been pivotal to the success of Everton this season, and at a fraction of the price of Pogba, he has to be one of the best signings this season.

Gana is no normal player because football is his second job, his main occupation is actually a dream infiltrator, just like Leonardo DiCaprio in Inception. Gana is one of the best in the business, and his success in his main field simply spills over into football and here’s why.

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Before the arrival of Schneiderlin, Gana was our main shield in front of the defense, and has since been given box to box duties, sprinting around the pitch giving tackles to anyone who wants one, because he has more than enough to spare.

Stop playing for Ireland, and you can be on my level too Jimmy
Stop playing for Ireland, and you can be on my level too Jimmy /

Gana’s outrageous defensive success comes from his main occupation. He stops the opposition’s attack before they even think about it, the night before in fact, as they sleep. Gana doesn’t just intercept the ball, he intercepts the concept of the opposition executing a successful pass. He doesn’t just tackle players with possession, he tackles the absurd idea that they can have the ball while on the same pitch as he is, all in their dreams as they sleep.

Idrissception

His tackling success is 75%, he has racked up 212 interceptions, and every time he loses the ball he instantly wins it back, tallying 559 recoveries. The man is a machine, and rumour has it after every match, he just sprints home.

McCarthy had a similarly incredible first season with Everton, then fell off and never really regained his midfield domination. I don’t think the same will happen with Gana, the fans instantly took to him, and I hope he will stay with us for our climb to the elite. A true joy to watch, a proper Everton player, he’s Gana face Chelsea on Sunday and they won’t be able to Kante-ain him (sorry).

Up the Ev.